Friday, January 18, 2008

Always My Little Boy...

We - my son, Adel and I - were watching a DVD -- "The Pacifier" at home the other evening. An old film but we just picked it out from our collection of DVDs for no good reason at all.
At the end of the movie, Vin Diesel and his leading lady Lauren Graham kissed.
Instinctively, I put my hand over Adel's eyes. Then, as quickly, I took my hand away, remembering that he is not a little boy no more, for heaven's sake!

Oh. Call me old-fashioned or stuffy. Whatever. And I don't know why I would always do that, although that was not a regular occurence.

But, just as I was taking my hand away, Adel remarked:

"Mummy, I'm going to be 18 in a couple of weeks...". He wasn't irritated. In fact, he seemed so amused by it all.

I almost slapped myself. I felt a little embarrassed for that unnecessary display of "over-protection".
My little boy is going to be 18! Did I know that he went through 15,16 and 17? was just yesterday that I changed his diapers! And how I remember him holding my hand ever so tightly as I led him into his kindergarten classroom which must have seemed to him to be a strange new world.

He is a big boy now. He's grown to be a very thoughtful, considerate and responsible son.

A man.

And soon he will be flying the nest...sigh!


Salt N Turmeric said...

Lol Kak Ena. ur too funny. im sure Adel was surprised too when u covered his eyes. tak sangka dah besar panjang ur son.

Anonymous said...

Kak Ena,

What is about mothers????

Here I am, the whole 155kg and forty years old of me, travelled to western Europe once fortnightly for assignment, in a whole six month, later part of a company that got listed and now blogging against the discrepancies of the Government....

And yet, my mother treated me as if I am the same "Atan", who was 8lbs, delivered by Dr R S McCoy at Assunta Hospital, PJ on thewee hours of 24 Oct 1967!

Her incorrigible nags are constantly nerve-wrecking.

Tell me, what is it with mothers? Cant their son grow to a person, as he is, without being nostalgic "Dulu masa dalam perut tu, lasak!".

Regardless, I love my mom!

And I love my daughter's mom!

And I love, other moms too, like you and Tok Mummy etc etc etc.

Take it from a large dog like me: you all are 'BITCHes'!

Bailey said...

how fast time flies, kak ena... =)

Mat Salo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mat Salo said...

Anybody who has had children, and if they're around long enough will eventual face the "empty-nest" syndrome.

I know it's cliche, but seems like it was only yesterday, huh?

Lol! Adel was amused? Ha-ha. I caught my younger boy a little too late playing his teenage brother's video game --and there was this scene where the characters were kissing. Too late too cover the eyes . . . but he looked at me and his eyes said, 'yeah, what's the big deal Pa?' My God.. he's only six!

They seem to grow old before their time huh?

zaitgha said...


I can relate to the closing eyes thingy ha ha ha...and yes though they are taller and bigger than us now, they always our little boys kan??

and yes...soon they will be leaving the nest...dont know if i ever be prepared for that...the joke in the house is that none of my boys will ever marry for as long as i was alive ha ha ha....

take care Nuraina and have a good weekend...

Anonymous said...

What a tender entry! :D

maria a samad (kak ton) said...

Ena still thinks Adel is err a boy.

I recall this incident when we were last in Singapore. All of us were waiting at the hotel lobby for the anak-anak teruna dan dara to come down from their rooms to go avisiting.

Then a young tall guy all dressed up walked towards us. Wow, who is this guy we asked each other.

Siapa ni? Ah, it was Adel. We didnt quite recognise him because he looked so grown up, very adult.

Ena said "Adel?"... maybe because he has always dressed in casuals.

Lalin said: "For heavens kak ena, It IS Adel. He's not a boy, he's a man!"

Enah with a look of disbelief and eyes almost popping out (ok, ok... I am exaggerating abit here) shook herself and said "ia lah," resigned to the fact that he is no more a "mama's boy."

Anonymous said...

Oh Gosh Kak Ena, absolutely understand how you feel.

Its either they're growing up too fast or not growing up fast enough....

On one hand, I am waiting for the day where they've all grown up and I can travel to my heart's content and on the other hand....I still want my babies in my arms forever and ever.

straycat's strut said...

At twenty-five, I am still wondering if there is any man who is "good." With exception to Dad, men are either bad for me or they are simply... bad. Its the same advise since the day I got my first pimple - to them, a sign that I have "perasaan." Bad sign.

But, I love u dad for that. Yeah, I lost a few good one, I think, but escaped from the bad one too...

Maybe he'll trust me when I reached menopause.

Anonymous said...

Sis Ena
Trust me, if you were to stroll along Nathan Road, Hong Kong with Adel these days, you had to tutup mata dia like forever. Hong Kong is so liberal. The big ahemm/woohoo posters that are on display, the top-shelf magazines that are on sale along the kaki lima. All staring starkly at you, and the poor kids ...

Rockybru said...

How I wish I was going 18 again! But it'd be such a bother to turn the clock back by nearly 30 years meh ..

Adel is a big boy. When I was 17, I had already done stints at several factories in Jurong, Singapore, as a production operator, machinist, etc. Bought my first guitar, took a girlfriend to the movies, bought my mom satay, paid for my own Marlboros.

Just before I turned 18, I was kicked out of Singapore by my late dad to Muar, where I schooled for 2 years, sat for my STPM, and paved the rocky road to be where I am today.

18 is Big, Ena.

Anonymous said...

Dear Nuraina,

Kudos to you for raising such a fine young man.

They grow up and grow wings all too soon, don't they?

Thanks for sharing with us this tender moment between a mother and her son.

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

whenever we- me & dad especially, watch a movie together and there was a steamy scene, i'd pretend to text message someone or simply get a drink or something. its just so awkward to be in such situation, worse than being in a twilight zone.

Keanorlinsya said...

aunty ena!!
and salam to all!!
read this froem ur point of view, and from aunty shana's...i wonder how it turn out if its from my parents? kene tunggu my wedding la kot. heh!

Rox said...

Adel has grown to be "a very thoughtful, considerate and responsible son" because he has a great mum!

Kak Teh said...

ena, once we went out as a family to watch a movie when our eldest announced that he wanted to watch a film rated 18. I said a firm no! He said, Mama, I am 21!!! but i was still adamant...not while we were under the same cinema roof. How can we forget that they've grown up....or is it because we are still in denial?
see you later today.

Pak Zawi said...

Let the children grow up. They will leave the nest but when their children come back to us, its like their reincarnation.

Anonymous said...

The other day my mom covered my eyes when there was a kissing scene from the DVD that we bought. Oh, and I am 32. Children will always be children in our moms eyes. :)

Anonymous said...

Kak Ena,

Let's not talk about Adel. You still think I'm 20!


farina: you know how they literally grow up before your eyes that you don;t realise it until one day ....

BigDog: yeah matter how big mama's boy has grown, he is still mama's little boy! sampai beranak cucu pun!

bailey: fast. I still remember the past like it was yesterday.

matsalo: bro...kita dah tua niii. and kids -- well, they don't make 'em like they used to.

zai: maybe i should make that a rule too..

mekyam: thanks mekyam.

Kak Ton: haha. i remember that! honest to goodness, i couldnt recognise him. gotta take him out of the home environ to make me see him the way he really is -- a big boy...ok ok.. a man.

angry taxpayer: that's so true! a mother's perpetual dilemma.

straycat: oh dear...let's hope not.

aMiR: I know. can u imagine..when I was in Amsterdam, I said to my (male) colleague -- "tempat ni bagus untuk turning boys into men!".

what was I thinking? and then he told me my son had a very sporting mum. and then I said: "who says I was talking about my son?".
and then he said: "mana boleh...double standard!"

well...i can't forever protect your child from the REAL world, the good or the bad! and why should he be protected...he's got to know,to experience.. (altho mesti-lah ada batasan..) because he's got to make choices, decisions..all on his own. and of course, to make mistakes and learn from those mistakes.
(ayooh...i probably don;t believe half o what i'm saying...)

i remember adel telling me: "mummy, marijuana is legal in amsterdam, kan?"

alamak...apasal-lah ada internet!
but, I couldn't tell him a lie.

so, thanks, aMiR for dropping by.

sesat: thank you. actually, i was and still, am, not prepared for Adel's "coming of age". i mean, he was 15 before he was 17....and at 13, he "broke his voice" (pecah suara).

i think i had (and still do have) a mental block.

thanks, sesat.

kerp: i've always appreciated the multi uses of the cell phone.
good call, kerp. otherwise you'd be twiddling your fingers or ears.

kea: let's hope not....haha,.. kalau tidak, susah-lah, kan?

roxanne: thanks, roxanne.

kak teh: i think i will probably do the same. and i think adel knows not to ask for my permission. he goes by the premise that what mummy does not know, won;t hurt her.

zawi: sigh.... oh yes. how right you are.

adrian: i can already see myself doing that to adel when he is 35!

lalin: you are 20!



you were 18?

after his SPM, Adel took on a temporary job with Lavand (a little store selling baklava) at MidValley.
it's a nice cosy job, I think. I was pleased he was not looking to work at MacDonald's or Fridays or any of those busy eateries.
it was a coincidence that he got the job as his close friend's mother is a good friend of the Lavand shopowner and they were looking for staff. and i'm not sure, but it could also be that adel knows that i like baklava and only those from Lavand.

he worked for a month, mostly night shifts. he couldnt work longer than that because he had plans to register for driving lessons, to resume his taekwondo, start guitar lessons and then start his pre-university studies.

i'll tell you a little secret.

i used to tell adel that if he ever wnated to date girls (seriously dating), he should only start when he's in college.

i guess, adel did listen to his mummy.

(rocky..he has told you why he plays games and keep fit, right?)