Friday, August 17, 2012

When Ramadan Nears The End....

..we thank Allah SWT for giving us the strength to carry out our ibadah.

I say it every Ramadan -- time flies so quickly that before we know it, it's the end of puasa and the start of Syawal.

Honestly,  it feels like only yesterday we were thinking of breaking fast on the first day of Ramadan this year, and seeing Ramadan stalls being put up around town.

Now, just one more day. And it is Raya.

These days, I get so melancholic thinking about those days when we were young.

And so many of the people I had known - family and friends - have gone.

This Ramadan alone, several friends have passed away, including a dear one, Wan Julia Hood -- someone I knew in secondary school and in UiTM (then ITM). After graduation we still kept in touch.

She moved to PJ (at least to my neighbourhood in section 16, PJ) in 1971.  She enrolled in Assunta Secondary School.  She was happy to have met (Arwah) Kak Eda and me who were living in the same neighbourhood.

We became friends. Continued to be when we all continued our studies in UiTM.

Later, when we were all married with our own families, we discovered that we were neighbours in Taman Tun Dr Ismail. How nice. Still we hardly ever met up but still never lost touch. The last time we met was at Istana Budaya for "The Secret Life of Nora" late last year.

I was so deeply shocked when I got the news that Julia had  passed away. Couldn't believe it at all. I just stared at the text message on my Blackberry. I felt a little dazed.

I kept repeating "Wan Julia? Wan Julia?"....kept seeing  her sweet face, smiling. Wan Julia was beautiful, outside and inside. She was a mother of seven kids (I think). Six beautiful girls and the youngest, a boy.

Al Fatihah. Al Fatihah....

With each passing year, I seem to think a lot about mortality. This comes with age or aging, I was told. It is natural and it is normal.
Oh..I know. Nothing is permanent in life. We all have to go, one day.

I have no uncles or aunts left on my father's side. The only surviving is my late uncle's (Bapak's youngest brother) widow.

On my mother's side, Mak's  older (and the eldest) and youngest sisters are still living - in Bangsar with her youngest daughter, Ana and, Mak Busu in Taman Tun Dr Ismail with her two older children, respectively.

But Wak Nah (Mak's older sister) is frail and not in good health. It's old age. She's in her late 80s.

Most of my older cousins have passed away.

Now, my siblings and our cousins (our generation) have taken over as the aunts and uncles the young ones look up to, as we did our Arwah2 aunts and uncles.

And to make us all go misty-eyed, my cousin, Ana, informed us during the earlier part of Ramadan, that Wak Nah would like to meet us (Mak's children) all on the second day of Raya.

You know when you get that kind of message, you kind of panic because you think "they know"........

I'm not even going to entertain any morose thoughts. But I feel sad.

So yes. Time flies.

I should stop before I go on and on...

Until then... Salam Aidilfitri..

Mohon ampun dan maaf  zahir batin..

Have a blessed Eid in this glorious month of Syawal.


Mat keluang said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
A Voice said...

I felt the same.

Since attending a revert Muslim buka puasa event and then writing about Rohingyas, some friends making a trip to Mynmar and later Palestine, and today was with my good friend while he was doing dialysis, I felt so humbled by the realisation of our mortality.

Anonymous said...

Dear Datuk Nuraina,
I read your post on Syawal 2011. I was in overseas that time. I wrote that I didn’t celebrate Eid because mom passed away.

I read your post on Syawal 2012 too. I am in Malaysia now. My arrival was greeted by visiting graves (mak and abah). Not excited at celebrating Eid, but I layan je anak2 sedara.

Sadness at death, the loss of people we love so dearly-sometimes, it is passable. Other times, it is aah!…….. But it does not ever vanish, it stays in our heart, I think. I guess, we are allowed to have our own reaction when a variable is beyond words.

Al fatihah to Wan Julia Hood. I pray for Wak Nah good health.

I hope I will be able to read your post on Syawal 2013, InsyAllah.

Selamat Aidilfitri.

BIGCAT said...

Al Fatihah for your parents and other beloved.
Selamat Hari Raya Kak Ina. Maaf zahir batin. Thanks for everything.


mat keluang: i let your comment thru because i thought it was funny. I have a sense of humour. but then, i was thinking, other people may, i decided to delete it.
but thanks for visiting and commenting.

selamat hari raya to you.


Voice: It's just these last few years when my older cousins and aunts and cousins passed away. And then my classmates and school mates...
really, life is so short..

Anon 2:03AM: thank you. my sentiments exactly.
I've been feeling this way in the last few years...
Hari Raya is approached and ushered in so differently for me, in my old age..
Al Fatihah to our beloved kith and kin, saudara-mara dan sahabat2 kita yang telah pulang ke rahmatullah.

Big Cat: Al fatiha. Thank you and selamat hari Raya Big Cat or is it Big Pussycat.

bruno said...

Nuraina,wishing you and family Selamat Hari Raya.

Anonymous said...

Salam Aunty Nuraina. Came across this quite randomly. Thank you for this post. Still cant believe the fact that she's gone at times. Heartbreaking. Still seems so surreal, but i have no choice but to let go and redha.. Al fatihah to my beautiful late mother Wan Juliah Hood. MasyaAllah, She was truly a beautiful person, zahir dan batin. May Allah place her amongst the pious and His believers. Amin.


bruno: thank you and same to you. (hope it's not too late)

anon@9:48PM: i know, my dear. I hope you and your siblings are ok...please take care. your late mum is dearly missed.