Salam Aidilfitri....

A very subdued Eid for us this year. But a blessed and wonderful Eid, nonetheless.

I wish all my Muslim friends a Happy Aidilfitri. Maaf Zahir dan Batin.

And to everyone -- happy holidays and take care!

Umno Polls Postponed To March Next Year..

...to facilitate "an early power transition" from Abdullah Ahmad Badawi to his deputy, Najib Abdul Razak.

Abdullah will also decide whether or not he will defend his postion before the party's divisional level elections begin on Oct 9.

The was the outcome of the special Umno supreme council meeting at PWTC in Kuala Lumpur this morning.

Abdullah who is the Prime Minister said Umno divisional elections would go on as scheduled from Oct 9 to Nov 9.

The Umno general assembly was to be held from Dec 16 to 20.

The original transition plan, which was announced in July, was for Abdullah to hand over the reins of power to Najib by June 2010.

Read more HERE and HERE.

So, there you are. A compromise. Pak Lah gets his way to have the party general assembly and elections postponed and Najib....well, almost, his.

Undoubtedly, tension is building up and it will continue to rise.

While it looks like the Prime Minister is handing over power ahead of 2010, presumably in March, he has not exactly made any commitment to do so.

In fact, it looks like he does not want to let go.

Meanwhile, we have players on the sidelines manouvering and, making moves, surely.

Perhaps, the tension, the heat, the uncertainty will subside in October when the PM makes known whether he is defending his presidency.

Only perhaps.

So, is Pak Lah out to see how many nominations he'll get? Read Rocky's Abdullah's Last Stand.

A Very Sad Ramadhan...

Shall I light a candle?
For the injustice that I see
I shall do that
Just As I shall say a prayer
many prayers
for my brothers
incarcerated

'Tis Ramadhan
Or didn't you know that?
A sad day, it is not supposed to be

'Tis Ramadhan
A blessed month
A holy month

So, why?

Why?

I shall light a candle
And I shall say my prayers....

nuraina samad

*I know any arrest or detention under the ISA need not have to be during Ramadhan, Aidilfitri, or Christmas, or Chinese New Year or Deepavali, for it to be a really sad thing. Any day is bad. Wrong. Cruel. Heartless. And a sad day for the detainee and his loved ones.

But this Ramadhan. A holy month. Soldiers were known to have laid down their arms during Ramadhan. A truce.
And, RPK was arrested and, begins a 2-year detention, during this holy month. I offer his family my very sad wishes. I hope they stay strong.

Raja Petra To Be Sent To Kamunting....

..to be detained for two years. He was served with the order last night.

This is indeed a sad piece of news to receive. What more, during Ramadhan.

The High Court is to hear his Habeas Corpus application.

The Malaysia Today editor and popular blogger begins his detention today.

According to Malaysiakini, Home Minister Syed Hamid Albar signed his detention order last night for Raja Petra to be held without trial under section 8(1) of the tough security law. Under the Act, the government can renew his detention indefinitely.

(From Malaysiakini):

Lawyers said the police had informed them this morning that they would be taking Raja Petra to the detention centre.

"Act by the minister to sign the section 8 order yesterday is completely unacceptable," said Raja Petra's lead lawyer Malik Imtiaz.

The Kuala Lumpur High Court is to hear a habeas corpus bid by Raja Petra's lawyers to overturn the detention of the controversial blogger today.

Habeas corpus is a writ ordering prisoners to be brought before a judge to ascertain if there are any procedural defects which could render their detention unlawful.

Raja Petra's wife Marina Abdullah confirmed that the police had informed her that the detention order had been issued by the minister yesterday.

Also present in the court this morning was recently resigned minister Zaid Ibrahim.

Raja Petra, 58, was arrested along with two others two weeks ago and has been under police custody in an unknown location.

The other two - Sin Chew Daily senior journalist Tan Hoon Cheng, 33 and Selangor senior executive councillor and parliamentarian Teresa Kok, 43 - have since been freed.Tan was released 18 hours after her arrest, while Kok was freed seven days later.

According to his lawyer J Chandra, Raja Petra was arrested for publishing articles on his news portal which tarnished the leadership of the country and insulted the sanctity of Islam.

The former newspaper columnist has already been charged with sedition and defamation after linking Deputy Prime Minister Najib Razak and his wife to the sensational murder of a Mongolian woman.

ISA Detention --Then And Now..

I'll say one thing -- good for the rakyat that they are making their opposition to the Internal Security Act heard loud and clear.

Times have really changed.

These days, if anyone is detained under the ISA, you can be sure that there'll be concerned citizens protesting outside the police station where the detainee is being held, and gathering for a candlelight vigil to show support for the detainee.

Raja Petra Kamaruddin is not alone. Neither were Teresa Kok and Tan Hoon Cheng.

It's good to know that some families of detainees have relied on the law to get their loved ones released on a writ of habeas corpus (an order that a prisoner be brought before a court to determine whether his detention is lawful).

They even hold Press conferences demanding the release of their loved ones.

The ISA maybe here to stay for now, as Home Minister Syed Abdul Hamid Albar said but any arrest of individuals under the Act will surely trigger an overpouring of protest. The support for the detainee comes just as swiftly and as strong.

We should be mighty proud of ourselves in this regard. That we, as a people, have come a pretty long way.

We dare to be heard. We dare. We are a courageous lot.

I remember when my own father was detained under the ISA in 1976 for alleged communist activities. He was, of course, as good as guilty. He was detained for four-and-half years and released in 1981 after making a televised confession that he was a communist.

It was a different time then, under different circumstances.

People feared the ISA and ISA detainees were a different category of prisoners who were best left undefended.

It was something we had to accept. We had no one who dared come forth to support us.
We did not seek legal counsel nor any lawyer offered us any counsel -- to get him released. No one dared fight for his release. No protest, except, if I remember correctly, from DAP's Lim Kit Siang. But privately, I believe one or two Cabinet ministers protested against the arrest, not only of my father's but others -- Abdullah Ahmad, Abdullah Majid and Samani Amin.

Outside the county, international human rights groups protested the arrests. But this had very little, or no impact at all, in securing his release.

I felt really good for Marina Abdullah when she and her children were allowed to visit Raja Petra within a week of his arrest.

Those days, we were not able to see our father until months later.

I don't know whether the ISA will ever be repealed or abolished. Some people believe that it is a necessary evil. Perhaps. But, so far, it has existed only to be misused and abused.

I don't know the statistics, but I'm sure there are more political detainees than insurgents. Tell me I'm wrong,

For now, my fervent wish and appeal to the government is for those detained under the ISA be released immediately.

**The Internal Security Act (ISA) is a draconian and an anachronistic law. It is a preventive detention law originally enacted in the early 1960s during a national state of emergency as a temporary measure to fight a communist rebellion.
Under Section 73 (1) of the ISA, police may detain any person for up to 60 days, without warrant or trial and without access to legal counsel, on suspicion that "he has acted or is about to act or is likely to act in any manner prejudicial to the security of Malaysia or any part thereof or to maintenance of essential services therein or to the economic life thereof."
After 60 days, the Minister of Home Affairs can then extend the period of detention without trial for up to two years, without submitting any evidence for review by the courts, by issuing a detention order, which is renewable indefinitely. The law has repeatedly been criticized by Malaysian human rights groups, the Malaysian Bar Council, the Malaysian Human Rights Commission, and international human rights groups, which called for its repeal.
The ISA's provisions violate fundamental international human rights standards, including prohibitions on arbitrary detention and guarantees of the right to due process and the right to a prompt and impartial trial.

Sheih's Out!

What great weekend news to have greeted me!

My brother, Syed Azidi Syed Abdul Aziz AKA Sheih Kickdefella was released from police custody yesterday afternoon.

He had been detained for three nights by the Commercial Crimes Investigation Department (CCID).

Later at a Press conference at his sister's home in Kuala Lumpur, Sheih said he did not give any statements to the police throughout the duration of his detention.

“I told them that if they wanted a statement, they would have to charge me and I will give my statements in court in front of a judge,” he was quoted to have said.

He said the police treated him well.

Sheih believes that his detention was politically motivated.

“They were trying to scare other bloggers and dampen my spirits. It didn’t work,” he said.

MCPX

According to Malaysiakini:

Immediately after his release, he was interviewed by officials from the Malaysian Communications and Multimedia Commission (MCMC) in the CCID headquarters in Kuala Lumpur.

He walked out of the CCID headquarters at about 4pm and was received by his family members and friends.

Syed Azidi was being investigated for posting allegedly seditious material in his blog kickdefella involving a campaign to fly the Jalur Gemilang (Malaysian flag) upside down.

Continue reading HERE...

And while you're at it, read Sheih's "I Found Al-Ghazali In Dang Wangi"....

Teresa Released

DAP Seputeh MP Teresa Kok was released at 1pm today, after being held under the Internal Security Act (ISA) for a week, said her lawyer Sankara Nair.

At press time, she was at tha Jalan Travers police station, he told Malaysiakini.

She will be holding a press conference at 3.30pm at the DAP headquarters in Petaling Jaya.

(from Malaysiakini)

Blogger Sheih Kickdefella Arrested

Update:

Sheih and his wife Bariah Ishak had been expecting the arrest when they were told that plainclothes police officers came by the Kelantan Menteri Besar's office in Kota Bharu in a dark-tinted Pajero yesterday.

The couple had been waiting for the police to pick up Sheih since.

"He just wanted to get it over and done with.. he was just so tired," Bariah told me (over the phone) this evening.

Sheih, 38, is the Kelantan Menteri Besar public relations officer.

When Bariah spied a dark-tinted Pajero passing by their house several times today, she knew the police had come for Sheih.

Three plainclothes policemen picked up Sheih about 5pm. He is being detained under the Sedition Act.

Bariah said Sheih was calm when he was taken away from their home in Demit, Kota Bharu.

"The policemen were nice enough to play along with us when we had to tell our four children that their father was going to KL for work," she said.

The couple had no heart to tell their children the truth although Bariah said their eldest (11 year-old) son sensed something amiss.

Asked how the police officers treated Sheih when arresting him, Bariah said they were polite and treated him well.

Sheih is said to have been taken to Bukit Aman but Bariah said until about 8pm, it was uncertain whether or not he had actually left Kelantan.

"I was told that he was still at the police headquarters here," said Bariah who is preparing to leave for Bukit Aman tomorrow.

"I pray for the best, for his well-being," she said.

Meanwhile, when contacted by Bernama today, Kelantan deputy police chief SAC II Amir Hamzah Ibrahim could not confirm the matter as the Kelantan police was not informed about it.

Sheih, 38, is the Kelantan Menteri Besar public relations officer.

****************************

My earlier report:

Police arrested blogger Syed Azidi Syed Abdul Aziz a.ka. Sheih Kickdefella in Kota Bharu, Kelantan today.

Got this from Rocky's Bru.

No further details. But will try to get an update soonest.

Give Me Just A few Days....

Anwar Ibrahim wants his meeting with Prime Minister Abdullah Ahmad Badawi to take place before he goes ahead with the power transition.

He told a 2pm Press conference today that more than 31 Barisan MPs have agreed to cross over to Pakatan Rakyat but declined to reveal their names.

He said that he would give the list of the names to the PM when he meets him.

Read the rest of the Star online report HERE.

Meanwhile, De facto Law Minister Zaid Ibrahim is sticking to his guns -- quit the Cabinet.

Today's THE Day......

Or is it?

Today is Malaysia Day. It is also September 16, the day Parti Keadilan Rakyat de facto leader Anwar Ibrahim is supposed to take over the leadership of the country from Umno president and Barisan Nasional chairman Abdullah Ahmad Badawi.


Here's the Bernama report:

PETALING JAYA, Sept 15 (Bernama) -- Parti Keadilan Rakyat (PKR) advisor Datuk Seri Anwar Ibrahim Monday night claimed that he had sufficient majority to form a new government.

He also claimed to have sent a letter to Prime Minister Datuk Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi Monday afternoon on the list of Barisan Nasional members of parliament who would cross over to Pakatan Rakyat.

However, Anwar who spoke before some 12,000 supporters at a 45th Malaysia Day celebration at the Petaling Jaya City Council Stadium in Kelana Jaya here, did not name the MPs involved.

Anwar, who is also the Opposition leader in parliament, said he would later be meeting the prime minister to discuss the change of government.

So, is today's Anwar's new dawn?

Can it possibly be?

PM Tells Zaid To Rethink....

KUALA TERENGGANU, Sept 15 (Bernama) -- Prime Minister Datuk Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi Monday advised Minister in the Prime Minister's Department Datuk Zaid Ibrahim to take a leave and rethink his decision to quit the post.

Abdullah said Zaid met him at Seri Perdana, the prime minister's official residence in Putrajaya, Monday afternoon and conveyed his intention to quit the post.

"He mentioned the matter to me but I said, think carefully.

"If he is tired, he can take a leave... a short one will do," Abdullah told reporters after breaking fast and performing the Maghrib prayers with the people and state leaders at the Abidin Mosque here.

Also present were Abdullah's wife Datin Seri Jeanne Abdullah, Menteri Besar Datuk Ahmad Said, Information Minister Datuk Ahmad Shabery Cheek and Umno Secretary-General Datuk Seri Tengku Adnan Tengku Mansor.

Zaid was reported to have tendered his resignation as Minister in the Prime Minister's Department and that the resignation letter was handed over to the prime minister in Putrajaya at 2pm Monday.

Abdullah confirmed that Zaid had sent the resignation letter to his office Monday.

However, the prime minister said he had yet to see the letter and that he did not know the reasons for Zaid's action.

"The letter is not with me. Zaid met me at home; the letter was sent to the office," he said.

Asked on what he thought of Zaid's decision, Abdullah said Zaid was free to do so and that his action would not weaken the cabinet.

Sunday, Zaid, the de-facto law minister, said he was prepared to be sacked or ordered to quit for speaking out against the government's use of the Internal Security Act (ISA).

He said the act should be used specifically to stem the activities of terrorists, communist subversives and those attempting to topple the government by force.-- BERNAMA

Zaid Ibrahim Quits In Protest Against ISA Arrests.

Zaid, you're de man!

Zaid has tendered his resignation as the Minister in the Prime Minister’s Department. He has just submitted his letter to Prime Minister Datuk Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi.

He has a meeting with the Prime Minister this afternoon.

The de facto Law Minister yesterday threatened to resign if the government continues to use the Internal Security Act, which allows detention without trial, against any individuals.

He had also called for the immediate release of DAP MP Teresa Kok and controversial blogger Raja Petra Kamaruddin who were arrested under the ISA last Friday.

Sin Chew Jit Poh senior journalist Tan Hoon Cheng who was also arrested the same day, was released yesterday.

Zaid feels that the use of the ISA to arrest these individuals "dealt a blow to his six-month-long task of trying to regenerate the judiciary".

*you can say what you like about Zaid. You can doubt, be suspicious of his action. Is there a hidden agenda?, you may ask.
Well....he spoke up, he protested and he quit in protest.
Do you see anyone else willing to do the same?
He may not be the first (nor the last) to speak up against the ABUSE of the ISA, but he sure is the only minister to have quit in protest against the use and abuse of the ISA.
For that, Zaid, you're de man.

MCPX

Isn't This A Crackdown?

Home Minister Syed Hamid Albar has said that the government is "not making arrests just for the sake of arrests."

"We will not make any more arrests under the ISA as long as there is no more disturbance to public peace and order," he told reporters in Johor Baru yesterday morning, hours before Sin Chew Jit Poh senior journalist Tan Hoon Cheng was released.

Malaysia Today editor and blogger Raja Petra Kamaruddin and Seputeh MP Teresa Kok are still being detained.

All three were arrested under the ISA on Friday.

RPK was arrested for publishing inflammatory including those which insult Islam, while Teresa for allegedly criticizing the "azan" (call to prayer) in a mosque in Kinrara. She has denied this and the mosque committee has backed her on this.

So, since the minister couldn't be straight, let me be -- this is a crackdown.

And this is intimidation.

In the first place, I wasn't aware that there was any disturbance to public peace and order.

I am shocked that the ISA is being used to "deal" with RPK and Teresa.

And on Hoon Cheng? I am very disturbed by this.

Arresting a journalist under the ISA for a report she had written? How can the government ever justify this?

But --oh, detaining her for 16 hours was for her own good because she had received threats to her safety?
Repeat that, please!
So does it mean that after 16 hours, from now on, her safety is assured?

(Hoon Cheng's controversial four-paragraph report quoting Bukit Bendera Umno division chief Ahmad Ismail calling the Chinese community ‘squatters’ sparked an outcry among the Chiense, including the Chinese political parties in the ruling Barisan Nasional.)

Was Hoon Cheng a threat to public/national security? Isn't that THE basis for any ISA arrest? That said -- not that ISA arrests in this country were made on that basis, in the first place.

For as long as the ISA is in existence, it will continue to be abused.

RPK Arrested Under ISA

Malaysia Today editor and controversial blogger Raja Petra Kamaruddin (or known as RPK) was arrested this afternoon under the Internal Security Act.

Three newspapers - Sin Chew Daily, The Sun and Suara Keadilan - were also issued show cause letters by the Home Ministry.

RPK's wife, Marina Lee Abdullah told Malaysiakini that 10 police personnel from Bukit Aman came to their home in Sungai Buloh at about 1.10pm to arrest him.
They also confiscated a computer, some books and VCDs.

At 1.50pm, the police personnel took RPK to an unknown destination.

Tuesdays Without Bapak

Told Kak Olin the other day that I feared the day Bapak would leave us. I feared the moment. I feared what I would have to face. I feared the morning after.

We were talking about it the evening Bapak breathed his last at the ICU of Pantai Medical Centre.

But when that moment came, I was too numb to feel anything, much less fear.

I think we all went through the motion of getting things done for him -- you know, to get him home, to prepare his grave...nothing actually sank in.

Did we weep?

A TV reporter, when interviewing me after Bapak's funeral, asked me whether I was keeping it all inside? Actually, it was not a question. It was a statement. He said I was keeping it all inside.

He could be right. But I told him that if the interview went a little longer, I'd probably be too weepy to say anything. I didn't think he believed me.

There were several occasions when I "sebak" and silently wept -- when I first saw him lying motionless, tubes in his mouth and limbs, on the hospital bed, then again at his bedside when he it was so clear that he was not ever going to get better, the evening he died, when I took part in pouring water over his covered body during "mandi jenazah" and later, when his shrouded body was lowered into his grave.

But those were brief moments.

It is during my "doa" after prayers that I weep over our loss. An aching loss. Over how much we miss him. The emotions come flooding, gushing, when I "sedekah "Al-Fatihah for him, for Allah SWT to bless his soul.

Of course, one day Bapak would leave us. We knew that.
But, I thought I would be prepared for the eventuality.
After 12 days going in and out of the ICU as Bapak laid critically ill, we all thought we would be prepared. How wrong we were.

But we are thankful that when he left us, it was on a blessed day of a blessed month. We thank Allah SWT for that.

I remember talking to Nina the day before Bapak passed away. We were looking, gazing into the glass door, at our Bapak. We were wondering how long he'd be that way.

I told her about a friend's father who was in hospital for three weeks before the doctors asked the family to make a decision.

We shivered. What a horrible thought.

Nina's eyes teared.

"Ya Allah," she whispered, her hands in supplication, "please, please, don't let us have to make the decision, If papa has to go, You decide and You take him...", and she wept.

Bapak (Nina calls him papa) died peacefully the next day. He was unconscious. His eyes opened slightly as Nina completed reciting the Yassin, and then, slowly shut. The the monitor triggered the red alert.

My step-mum was also there, reciting the Fatihah.

The nurses rushed in and said "Tan Sri is no more"....

Both my step-mum and Nina were in a daze, trying to absorb the moment as the nurses rushed to Bapak.

"He went so peacefully just as I finished reciting the Yassin," Nina kept saying. You could sense that she found much comfort in that.

Ramadhan this time, is, of course. different. But it is not sad, in a sorrowful way.

We've been warned that we'll feel the aching loss during Aidilfitri.

We feel it now.

We lost our mother in 1990. Then, our eldest sister, Kak Piah in 1994. And only last year, we lost Kak Eda.

We grieve. People do not quite get over the loss of their loved ones. They heal in different ways.

I know I can never quite utter the word "arwah". I could not for Mak, Kak Piah or Kak Eda.

May Allah bless your soul, dear Bapak....gone, but always in our hearts, in our prayers.

Al-Fatihah.

Farewell, Bapak..

Bapak has been laid to rest at the Bukit Kiara Muslim Cemetery.

Yesterday, the weather seemed inclement, threatening to rain. But it held up all day until long after the funeral. It only began to drizzle in the evening.

Bapak's body was taken to the UIA Mosque (Masjid Al-Malik Faisal) at about 11.35am for prayers to be performed . How blessed that it was a Friday when there would surely be a full congregation.

Prime Minister Datuk Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi was at the mosque to join the congregation in performing the prayers.

After prayers, Bapak's body was taken to the cemetery.

It was very kind of Pak Lah to have his outriders accompany Bapak in his final journey to his resting place.

When we were making burial arrangements, we were hopeful that there was still space at the cemetery which is already almost full to the brim.

We were thankful when the cemetery managers said there were still "one or two" plots available.

It did not matter where the plot was because the other alternative would be in Kota Damansara or Puchong. Too far. Mak and Kak Piah are in Bukit Kiara.

We had no idea which spot had been given to Bapak. At least neither Lalin nor I did.

We (Lalin, our nieces, my daughter and I) arrived at the cemetery early and made our way to the burial plot. We followed some people ahead of us.

My friend, blogger Bernard Khoo (Zorro Unmasked) had already arrived and he walked along with us.

The route seemed to take us deep into the older part of the cemetery that made me think that we had made a mistake.

I saw Lalin waving at us, indicating that we were not mistaken, after all.

We made our way and found a crowd, including the media, had already gathered.
My step-mum, my sisters and their daughters as well as my good friend, Mia and her daughter, Liyana were already there.

As I stood there, I thought that Bapak's spot seemed to be near Mak's. I looked around at the gravestones to locate Mak's. It'd be good if they were near each other.

I looked down at the spot where Bapak's grave had been dug, shifted my eyes a little and Mashaaallah! I saw that it was just "above" Mak's, in the next row.

How amazing was that? So so close to each other. Almost touching each other.

Alhamdulillah!

Soon, Bapak's remains arrived, along with a group of men. The crowd then grew bigger. I spotted many familiar faces.

Bapak was then prepared for burial. I watched as they lowered his shrouded body into the ground.

My heart missed a beat. My eyes began to tear.

Thank God, I had my sun glasses on.

The funeral proceeded in fine weather -- warm and a little balmy, at times.

I could hear the rustling leaves, teased by a playful breeze. I could feel the coolness of the moment. I felt a depth of emotion.

After the funeral, we took turns to sprinkle rose petals, bunga rampai and water on Bapak's new home.

It was then time to leave our beloved Bapak to his eternal rest, promising him that we would return...often.

May Allah bless your soul, Bapak. Thank you for those wonderful years. We are eternally grateful to you and we love you forever.

Al-Fatihah.

Amin, Amin, Amin....

Bapak Has Left Us

Alfatihah. My dad passed away at 5.58 pm today.

Thank you for all your prayers for him.

May God Bless You.

We are taking Bapak's body back from the hospital to the house at 2, Lorong 16/7C, Petaling Jaya now.

The kebumi will be at Bukit Kiara after Friday prayers tomorrow.

We Pray For A Miracle..

UPDATE:
-----------

5.30PM: Second dialysis failed. Blood pressure dropping. He is losing the fight...

--------------------------

My earlier posting:

Bapak's kidneys have grown weaker and he needs another dialysis today.

This is not good news.

Yesterday afternoon, he was put on a dialysis because his kidneys were very weak.
Because Bapak had breathing difficulty, a tracheotomy was also done on him earlier yesterday.
(Tracheotomy is a surgical procedure to open up the windpipe.)

During the dialysis yesterday, we were told that Bapak was "tolerating well". And his heart remained okay.

We were hopeful.

It has been 12 days now.

Only twice were we hopeful. The first time was after being admitted, when the respirator was taken off him as well as the sedation as he appeared to be stronger.

The second was yesterday when he was "tolerating well" during the dialysis.

But, really. I don't know what we were hopeful for.

Wasn't Bapak already critical so please call our relatives, then he went downhill, and now on palliative care.

Deep inside, we all wish for a miracle....that he'll just open his eyes, sit up, rip those tubes out of his limbs, and just get out of that horrid hospital bed...

"Bawa aku balik...." I can just imagine him saying to us.

Oh....how we pray for his recovery. And now, for a miracle.

Miracles do happen, didn't someone say?

And if none happens, it is by His grace and His will..

We redha...Amin.

Tuesdays With Bapak

Say A Prayer -- September 2 2008

I am remembering the time we were all at the Intensive Care Unit of Pantai Medical Centre in June 1990.

Mak was lying on the bed with all sorts of tubes in her mouth, needles in her arms. It was not how we wanted our mother to be but she was very ill.

Bapak visited her regularly, holding her hands, whispering in her ears, reciting prayers.

But Mak succumbed to a heart attack after a week.

This time, we watch Bapak, frail and motionless -- tubes in his mouth, nose and arms.

It has been eight days since Bapak was admitted to the hospital for lung infection. He was treated for lung and blood infection.

There was that brief period last week when he was conscious and communicating with us. Then the infection came back and he was put on a respirator and sedated.

We were still able to be with him to recite the Yassin.

When his condition worsened, he was not allowed any visitors. Only family members were allowed in . They must don the mask and apply antiseptic on our hands before entering and after leaving his room.

When his condition did not improve, Dr Ridzwan allowed only one family member to be inside the room. It seems logical that my step-mum be with Bapak.

Dr Ridzwan wanted to make sure his infection is contained.

We are happy that at least a family member is with Bapak to comfort him and recite the Yassin and read the Quran.

When my step-mum steps out for meals or prayers or when she goes home to freshen up and rest, Bapak is alone. A nurse sits outside, keeping watch.

Since his condition worsened, he has been allowed visitors. But they can only see him from outside, through the glass panel.

Former Prime Minister Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad and his wife, Tun Dr Siti Hasmah visited him early last week when he had already regained consciousness after being admitted.

Dr Ridzwan briefed Tun on Bapak's condition. All the while, Tun held Bapak's hand.

I was thinking how youthful Tun looked. He is just a year younger than Bapak.

He stressed on one thing -- he never smoked.

Bapak's heavy smoking had always been Dr Ridzwan's bone of contention with Bapak.

"I have been quarreling with Pak Samad about this for the past 15 years," he remarked.

Dr Ridzwan never gave up. But Bapak is a stubborn old man.

Nina intimated, and to Dr Ridzwan's horror, that Bapak was still having his last puff about a month ago, before he became bed-ridden.

"There's nothing we could do," Nina said, forlornly.

When Deputy Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Razak visited Bapak yesterday, he seemed familiar with Bapak's notorious habit.

"And he was still smoking ......", Najib, said, smiling and shaking his head.

And I believe if Bapak could hear our conversation, he'd probably --- well, he is a stubborn old man.

So, the stubborn old man is now frail, listless and helpless.

We are hopeful for his recovery. We continue our do'a, our prayers.

Allah SWT knows best.

*I wanted to write a happier "Tuesday With Bapak" but Bapak did not get better. Please bear with me.
My family would like to thank all the people who visited Bapak including his old friends - Aunty Lin, PC Shivadas, Ibrahim Ngah, Philip Mathews (and wife), Tan Sri Mazlan Noordin, Wahab Majid (and Family), Syed Husin Ali, Datuk A Samad Said (and wife), Datuk Abdullah Abdul Rahman (and wife), Tun Daim Zainuddin, Tun Musa Hitam, Datuk A Kadir Jasin (and wife), Tan Sri Abdullah Ahmad, Zainuddin Maidin, Datuk Nazri Abdullah (and family), Datuk Khalid Mohd, Datuk Zahid Hamidi, Datuk Idris Tulis, Datuk Manja Ismail (and wife, Noorzita), Datuk Shukor Hassan and wife, Datuk Rejal Arbee and Datin Noraini, the family of the late Usman Awang, Datuk Ng Poh Tip, as well as former NSTP journalists Ahirudin Attan, Shamsul Akmar, Kee Thuan Chye, Aishah Ali, Rose Ismail, Hisham Harun, Baidura Ahmad, Saleha Ali, Wahti Maidin, Rusdi Mustapha, Tengku Sharifuddin, Ashraf Abdullah, Saiful Azhar and Rosidi Daud. Also Ann, Aman Ali, Hardev Kaur, Zainul Arifin, Theresa Manavalan, Kamarulzaman Salleh and Suraya Alatas.
Thank you also to Prime Minister Datuk Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi and Parti Keadilan Rakyat adviser Datuk Seri Anwar Ibrahim and PKR leader Datuk Dr Wan Azizah who visited Bapak yesterday and Information Minister Datuk Shabery Cheek who came by on Sunday.
And also to Lim Kit Siang and Dr Tan Seng Giaw as well as Datuk Shaziman.
And to all my brothers and sisters in and outside of blogosphere for their prayers and their well wishes.

UPDATE: (3pm, Sept 2, 2008)
Bapak's kidneys are not too good and they need to put him on a dialysis. They need to make an insertion in his trachea because he has difficulty breathing.
I saw that he was getting blood transfusion. Again.

It's downhill,I was told.

I pray for a miracle.

Ramadan Mubarak

A poem for Ramadan

Ya Ramadan!,

In the name of Allah, the most Merciful, the most Kind

A blessed month is casting its shadow upon us
A night of this month is better than a thousand months
Bear with patience for the sake of Ar-Rahman
It's a continuous training to strengthen our Imaan.

Glory be to Allah who sent Ramadan as a mercy to mankind
Its a purification of our soul, our heart, and our mind
With the most sincere devotion and love we fast
To be cleansed and free from sins of the past

Glorified is He, who choseth this holy month,
To test our sabr and fill our hearts with warmth
Of his Divine Light, His blessings shall glow,
The Seer of the unseen, all He does know

Ya Allah! For thee, let my breath be more pleasant than musk
Ya Allah! For thee, let me be thankful when day turns to dusk
My thoughts and heart are purified, my eyes truly see'
This blessed month, the month of spiritual rhapsody!

Ya Allah! For thee, my life I shall live!
Ya Allah! For thee, my soul I shall give!
In the name of Allah, the most Merciful, the most Kind,
Praise be to Allah, who sent Ramadan as a gift to mankind

I wish everyone a happy and blessed Ramadan.

Peace .....