Monday, February 15, 2010

Empty Nest

As my kids get older, I get really nostalgic.

Looking at old photos brings a rush of emotions.

"I remember when that photo was taken", or "I can't remember Adel/Shaira as a baby..." or "that was such a long time ago.."

The best is -- "oh my, it seems like only yesterday....."

Adel just turned 20 and is in college. Shaira will soon be going to college.

Perhaps, I'll have more time to do that long-overdue spring-cleaning, or get into some worthwhile activity.

Or something.

24 comments:

GUiKP said...

Sis Ena

No, I haven't come to that stage yet. But recently in Facebook, I met again with all the wonderful people who came into my life in my late teens. What a nostalgic and scintillating moment. We reminisced about our eccentric A-Levels teachers, our faux pas, our formative years in a far far away land, etc etc. And I want my children to have that kind of (mis)adventure too.

Cheers.

sesat said...

Diagnosis: onset of empty nest syndrome

Prognosis: no known cure

pakmat said...

..you are almost there, lady..to the ENS..Empty Nest Syndrome..:)and being nostalgic is but only half of it..but its ok..inasmuch as you looked back and reminisced..you will be looking forward, too..their marriages..your first cucu..of which no words can describe or explain that lump and joy as you take him/her into your arms..you will be apart yet a part of them..as you accept the coming of your twilight..for by then, every activity that you indulge in will be worthwhile...:)

Jahamy said...

Butisnt it really wonderful to be able to see your kids into college?

Wonderful to be able to hold adult conversations with them...imagine they were just your babies once!

What blessings!

Peace !

NURAINA A SAMAD said...

dear GUiKP
you are a young dad. :-)
watch your kids grow, remember their smiles...because before you know it, they're taller than you.
they grow right before your eyes, and you don't know it.

that's the wonderful thing about FB. i got re-connected with my good friend in primary/early secondary school. she left for London with her family. that was some 40 years ago.

and yes, i do want my kids to experience all my (mis)adventures. what a journey.
but you know what, i have myself to blame if they don't. and oh -- i will in turn, blame technology and the crazy world we live in now.

Anonymous said...

dont worry, the empty nest is, but temporary.

the moment the kids got babies, they might find the "empty nest" a good free baby sitting facilities hahahaha :-)

NURAINA A SAMAD said...

sesat,

no?
i suppose i'll have to learn to embrace it.....

NURAINA A SAMAD said...

pakmat,

aaah....

i'm beginning to see all that:-)

NURAINA A SAMAD said...

jahamy,

i know i know...and i do so enjoy them now.

but, it just feels that time flies so swiftly, so fast. that sense of longing for their early years when you could cuddle them ...

Peace, bro!

Anonymous said...

Hi Nuraina,

its so nostalgic and heart-wreaking (sedih, pilu) to read your posting this time around as it leads me to reflect on my life too.

I work in the Construction sector. My line of work takes me to all over Malaysia. My wife is working in the State Government so it was not possible to transfer and live with me to where I work. So, I become a weekend husband and father. I have 2 kids, both boys, both grown-up and yes, like you said, they are taller than me now hahaha...

I missed their growing up so much so that they seem to me like yesterday they are small and today they are so grown up. I really wish I can start again. No money in this world can buy that feeling when you are with them.

Since then, I'm now back to my hometown and to stay put : no more out-station postings. Then again, like you, I have nothing to do. Maybe we can form a cyber group think tank to suggest what we can do to use the most productive phase of our life.

Thank you.
- Hantu Siber -

NURAINA A SAMAD said...

anon@10.57AM,

oh yes. i know that will happen. :-)

NURAINA A SAMAD said...

anon@12:17pm/hantu siber,

now that you're sticking around, make the most of it and ...enjoy!

i believe that things -- good and bad -- happen for a reason.

i'm bracing for the inevitable.

come to think of it, time does fly...so before i know it, i'll be having grandkids...

a cyber group think tank, huh? cool!

Anonymous said...

Nuraina,

Nothing is forever - everything is a fleeting moment.Ive always believed in letting my kids live their lives, travel far, play hard work hard...

This is the time for you to try something new - try skinny dipping to *celebrate* this new phase in your life. No worries as conservative as Msia is there are always some remote spots! Ahh... so exhilarating.

rem said...

kau tak tua lah nuraina.
anak dah besar, kau suka baca buku resip.
kalau ajak jalan2 semua tak mau ikut.
well, welcome to the club.
kesian kita.

(50yr old pakcik. with 21 and 18yr olds, watching old movies alone. remgold).

Anonymous said...

How about rejoining the "human race"?
Take a good look at Ibrahim of Perkasa. Does he look like Hitler of the Nazi?

NURAINA A SAMAD said...

Anon@10:54PM,

i so agree. nothing is permanent nor last forever...

skinny-dipping? ayayaya..
let me see...if you can reach a remote place, then, it cannot be that remote. :-)

NURAINA A SAMAD said...

remy,

hahah..tak tua?
these days, i find myself really clumsy. kadang2, terjatuhkan barang dari dalam tangan.

and then, bila duduk bersila lama, nak bangun, adoi, lutut sakit.

ok. itu physical aje.

kesian kita, kan? anak2 semua dah besar bagak. dah tak perlu our company! :-(

menanti ketibaan cucu2.

take care, rem...:-)

Anonymous said...

Tak caya Nuraina, there are remote splaces in Msia but if I tell ya it wont be remote no more : ) You can still run around the house in your bday suit la.

No way duk *jaga cucu*. Babysit now n then ok. Itu kerja dorang. Pandai buat -pandai jaga and they have a right to go thru all those phases of bringing up a family right. Saw my mom doing that, then when father died she was at a lost, duk mnungu/mengharap cucu although she is a very educated lady and loves traveling, books etc. Am more into the Buddhist concept of non-attachment. Enjoy the moment but time to let go.

Anonymous said...

Ena,

I have 5 kids and at various stages of their studies. Quite proud to say that they are doing extremely well with their exams UPSR,PMR and SPM(waiting for result). However at this juncture I find out it is very difficult to enrol them in boarding schools (form 1 and form 4)or securing scholarship to further studies unlike before. With cut backs on education budget i.e. PTPN budget slash, meals cutbacks and limited scolarships to further studies; I beginning to wonder what future holds for our future generations for those parent who can't afford to support their childrens' education.

Sorry. Maybe lari tajuk sikit but at this juncture I would rather have an empty nest as long they are happy and successful in pursuing their eduacation and future. Maybe in not too distance future I still eat my humble pie

Proud Parent

Assoc. Prof. Dr.Fatimah Kari said...

Empty nest syndrome
Sis - yeap your're right. I am about to go through that. I seige every opportunity that I have to be with them. I was on my community service field work last week and I bring along my first son ( soon to enter college)and he play his violent to my favourite tune during our free time during the field work. Alhamdullilah - need that and got that. I knew that sort of thing will "rarely" come my way once they are pursue their own life. Thank

NURAINA A SAMAD said...

anon@8:48PM,

if too remote, bahaya. :-)

i know what you mean about taking care of your grandkids...
i suppose as grandparents, our job is to dote on them.
the new-generation parents have got their own ideas of raising kids. so, our kids may not need our help, after all.
they're scared their kids will turn out spoilt like them.:-)

NURAINA A SAMAD said...

proud parent,

that's good to know. hope you have better luck soon enough (with the placement of your kids in boarding schools)

i pray for a better future!

NURAINA A SAMAD said...

dr fatimah,

make the most of it while you can!

halim said...

I recently attended a school reunion in JB, have not met these guys in more than 40 years. Nostalgia is sometimes painful but its good pain.